“My mother wanted us to understand that the tragedies of your life one day have the potential to be the comic stories the next.” – Nora Ephron
Raised in Beverly Hills, Nora Ephron dreamed of living in New York and becoming the next Dorothy Parker. Instead she became the first Nora Ephron. Unforgettably quotable, her life was like the books and movies she wrote: a hybrid of comedy and drama, and drama that led to comedy.
“I hope you will find some way to break the rules and make a little trouble out there. And I also hope that you will choose to make some of that trouble on behalf of women.“
After graduating from Wellesley College in 1962, Ephron briefly interned in President Kennedy’s White House but yearned to be a writer. Applying for an opening at Newsweek, she was told they didn’t hire women writers. Instead, she worked in their mailroom. Post-Newsweek, she was a member of the successful class action lawsuit brought against the company for sexual discrimination.
Ephron joined the New York Post as a reporter and her success led to an Esquire column on women’s issues. Her humorous cultural essays on a woman’s place in the world, most notably her essay about body image, A Few Words About My Breasts, would continue throughout her career including her 2006 work I Feel Bad About My Neck: And Other Thoughts on Being a Woman.
“Never marry a man you wouldn’t want to be divorced from.”
In 1967 Ephron married Dan Greenburg, a fellow writer, humorist and journalist. The couple amicably divorced in 1976, the same year she married Washington Post reporter Carl Bernstein. Assisting him on a screenplay rewrite based on All The President’s Men, she became one of the few people to learn the true identity of “Deep Throat.” As revenge after their 1980 divorce, she told everyone who asked the real identity behind the well-guarded secret.
The couple divorced when Ephron, pregnant with their second son, discovered Bernstein was having an affair. Her only novel Heartburn was a fictionalized version of their marriage and she wrote the screenplay for the subsequent film. Her character was played by Meryl Streep.
In 1987 Ephron married her third husband, author, producer and screenwriter Nicholas Pileggi, who received an Academy Award nomination for co-writing the screenplay for Goodfellas.
“I try to write parts for women that are as complicated and interesting as women actually are.“
Ephron received her first of three Academy Award nominations for co-writing the screenplay for Silkwood. That success led to her writing a string of legendary romantic comedies including When Harry Met Sally . . ., Sleepless in Seattle and You’ve Got Mail. Often working with her sister Delia, Ephron spent her life exploring a woman’s place in modern life through screenwriting, playwriting, books of collected essays and film directing. She wrote and directed her final movie, Julia and Julia, reuniting with Meryl Streep.
“Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim.”
Ephron was diagnosed with leukemia in 2006. Hiding the diagnosis for fear it would impact her career, she continued working until her death in 2012 at age 71. Her final book of essays, I Remember Nothing, hinted at her declining health. She listed things she wouldn’t miss including dry skin, bras, technology in general, and panels on Women in Film. What would she miss? Waffles, the idea of waffles, bacon, butter, twinkle lights, pie, and, of course, laughs.