Martha Stewart ushered in an era of women seeking domestic perfection for which I’m not sure I’ll ever forgive her.
Thanks to Martha, almost none of us can do enough to make a party themed and festive, decorate our homes in a complimentary palette, or create lush, landscaped gardens dotted with DIY hen houses. The Venn diagram of my love-hate Martha relationship sets up between “wow, great idea!” to “you’ve got to be kidding”, with the sweet spot being the hour I spend flipping through her magazine or scrolling her website, daydreaming about our next dinner party (whenever that can happen).
So it’s no surprise that Martha Stewart has adapted the holiday cookie exchange for Covid times.
Her how-to for hosting a virtual cookie party offers tips and tricks to rescue this holiday tradition from a typical 2020 fate. From designing digital invitations to choosing a color theme that coordinates everything from packing materials to your guests’ outfits, Martha’s never-say-never philosophy makes one feel guilty for not even trying to salvage this holiday mainstay.
Bake sturdy cookies that hold up in the mail. Create a digital recipe book for guests to keep. Email everyone the same backdrop so it looks like you’re all in one (digital) room. Create a playlist for guests to spin during the party, and plan an activity — a cooking demonstration, say — so everyone can join in the (virtual) fun.
While I appreciate the effort — and expect nothing less from Martha — this time I think I’ll pass. Color-coordinated glam-and-glitzy outfits? Unless that includes black leggings and an oversized sweater, I’m out. Nor do I feel like packing up a dozen cookie tins with tissue and dropping them in the mail. Isn’t the one good thing about being confined to home the fact that it’s now perfectly acceptable to ship holiday gifts directly from the couch?
I prefer Betty Crocker’s cookie swap, which is actually an advent calendar comprised of Betty’s 24 favorite holiday treats. Each day in December, one perfect recipe appears in my inbox that I can choose to keep or delete, no color-coordinated pressure involved. Or you can just bake what Betty says is your state’s favorite holiday treat for the people in your pandemic pod. Simple, easy and sweetly satisfying.
This year, I’ll be savoring Easy Spritz Cookies while watching Netflix on my couch, happy and cozy in my leggings and sweater. But don’t tell Martha. I can already sense her disappointment.